Online date???

Question: Is it wrong and sin to talk to or "online date" with someone that is not a member of our church? I am really confused about dating people who are not members. I know that we should date people within our church, but I want to know more about this.

Answer: Your specific question asks whether it is wrong to chat or "online date" with someone who is not a member of our church. While it is not wrong to "chat" with people via the Internet, such contact with others—particularly people we do not know—is usually not advisable. While we might get advice from a Web site on a particular subject, striking up blind "relationships" online can be very risky and ill-advised. There are just some things we cannot know about people and their intentions when all we do is read written text from them.

As for dating someone outside of the United Church of God, you should seek and follow the advice and direction of your parents. Fundamentally, the Church teaches that people should marry in the faith, and as such, their dating (when they are old enough to do so) should ideally be with other people of like-mind, spiritually.

Often, young people will get interested in someone of the opposite sex who does not share their religious beliefs and will claim "we're just friends." Yet, that is usually the first step to a more serious relationship. As such, we feel that the admonition and principle explained by the apostle Paul in 2 Corinthians 6:14 applies to this situation: "Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?"

Of course, there is much more to the subject of dating that should be considered by a young person.




http://www.verticalthought.org/qa/dating.htm

Friendship Quiz

Friends are a great blessing and a major part of life. Friendships are not only fun, they help give us the support and companionship God made us to need.
But they can also be a pain and give us some of the biggest challenges of life.
What kind of friend are you? What can you do to be a better friend and to help build better friendships? This quiz can help you gauge your current FQ (friendship quotient) and reinforce some of the keys to better friendships.

The Quiz

1. This quiz is going to solve all your friendship problems and make you the most popular person in your school or perhaps the universe.


a) Yes, what else would I expect from such an excellent publication?
b) Sounds like a little bit much to ask of small quiz. I think it's just for fun.
c) This is stupid, but I'll look at one more question to give it another chance.




2. A friend tells you that he or she has two tickets to a great game or concert, but you promised another friend you'd help with a litter cleanup drive that day.


a) You accept the great offer and start trying to figure out what to tell your other friend. Surely he or she will understand?
b) Decline the offer since you already promised your other friend.
c) Ask if you can get back to him or her later after you check with your other friend about possibly rescheduling.




3. Someone in your group of friends starts talking behind your back—saying mean things about you.


a) Forget about that “friend” (with friends like that, who needs enemies?), but be doubly sure you don't let your true friends down.
b) See if you can talk to the person in private to find out if you did anything to offend him or her.
c) Warn your other friends about what the person is doing and encourage them to avoid the person, but avoid the temptation to spread bad things you know about him or her.




4. You move to a new school and you don't know anyone!


a) If someone acts friendly, take it as a sign you've just met your new best friend.
b) Be friendly to everybody—you never know who your new best friends will be.
c) Try to make as many friends as possible, and don't be in too much of a rush to make a best friend. 
Sometimes it's good to really get to know people before choosing who to spend the most time with.




5. When your friends are trying to decide what activity to do, you:


a) Quickly throw in your idea and explain the advantages.
b) Wait to hear everyone else's ideas before seconding one or suggesting a compromise.
c) Worry that they'll suggest something your parents don't want you to do.
d) Remind everyone it's your turn to pick (even if not everyone likes your idea).




6. One of your friends seems to be upset and talks about doing something wrong.


a) You tell him or her to stop talking crazy and come do something fun.
b) Don't say anything and wait till it blows over.
c) Let the person know you're there to talk about it if he or she wants to.
d) If it is a serious matter, talk to your parents or another adult about it.




7. It is most important that a friend:

a) Be loyal.
b) Be giving.
c) Be encouraging/supportive.
d) Be patient.
e) Not be rude.
f) Be humorous.
g) Be understanding.
h) Have similar values and interests.
i) All of the above.
j) Other _________________________.



Friendship



Scoring

Don't you hate those artificial quizzes that only have one obvious right answer? Since we don't know you or your friends, more than one answer could work on some of these, depending on the personalities and interactions of your group of friends. And you could probably come up with better answers! But here are a couple things to think about:


1.
a) Thanks for the compliment, but you're scaring us!
b) We hope it's fun.
c) We appreciate your honesty and giving us another chance.


2.
a) Are you sure he or she will understand?
b) Your loyalty is to be commended.
c) It could be worth a try.


3.
a) Seems like there's a mystery here—it might be good to know why before giving up on your friend.
b) Check out Matthew 5:23-24 and 18:15.
c) The temptation will be great!


4.
a) Might be, but life's not always that simple.
b) Good point.
c) Though rarely practiced, there's something to be said for choosing your closest friends (see Proverbs 12:26 and 13:20).


5.
a) Take me to your leader.
b) Peacemaker, anyone?
c) Sometimes the worry is justified—but is there some way you can head it off? See a and b.
d) Fairness takes some finesse to ensure everyone has fun.


6.
a) Depending on the person's personality and the type of problem, this could help snap them out of it.
b) Some problems do get better with a good night's sleep.
c) We all need good friends like you!
d) Getting help to keep your friend safe is more important than possibly making him or her upset at you.


7. We like all of them!

Baptism just to get married???

God wants us to have lasting marriages and long-lasting marriages bring the greatest happiness, it is important for us to choose carefully whom we marry. The principle of not being unequally yoked (2 Corinthians 6:14), is vital in this regard. While the passage in 2 Corinthians is specifically discussing the contrast between Christ and idols, the principle is likewise applicable to marriage. Marrying someone who shares our religious values provides a very important basis for compatibility.


Regarding baptism, we don't recommend baptism in order to get married. Baptism should be a separate, personal decision one makes because he or she wants to honor God and enter into a covenant with Him. Baptism is the most important covenant we make in this human life. Marriage is likewise a very important covenant, but still not as important as our relationship with God.


Given this perspective, our recommendation is that people seek baptism prior to marriage. Sometimes, as young people consider marriage, they are sobered by the importance of such a decision and, in the process, realize that baptism is also an important step they want to take. Under such circumstances, a minister will usually counsel people for baptism first and then counsel them for marriage.


When young people marry and later get baptized, we are pleased for them, but we wouldn't recommend this as the best course of action. If someone truly wants to obey God, this will include baptism, and the best chance for a happy marriage is to marry someone who likewise wants to fully obey God. While someone may have good intentions about getting baptized, it is also possible that he or she might not. If you are baptized, I'm sure you will want to marry someone who shares your convictions.


As you suggest, the real key is a person's attitude. Some may get baptized simply to marry another person. If they do, this is unethical, and this is why it is important to talk with a potential mate to see if he or she truly is spiritually compatible. What another person says about God and how he or she acts are usually good indicators of his or her true intentions.


-- http://www.verticalthought.org/qa/baptism.htm --

11 Things You Didn't Learn in School

-- By Charles Sykes, from his book "Dumbing Down our Kids"

Rule 1:  Life is not fair - get used to it.

Rule 2:  The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3:  You will NOT make 40 thousand dollars a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone, until you earn both.

Rule 4:  If you think your teacher is tough, wait until you get a boss. He doesn't have tenure.

Rule 5:  Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping - they called it opportunity.

Rule 6:  If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7:  Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you are. So, before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parents' generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.

Rule 8:  Your school may have done away with winners and losers but life has not. In some schools they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9:  Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you find yourself. Do that on your own time.

Rule 10:  Television is NOT real life (nor are video games). In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11:  Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.

The day you said Hello... ♥



… Indeed, it all started with one HELLO. I never expected how you change my simple life… with just a simple smile of you. Back then, everything is NORMAL but now it’s kinda different… No matter how hard I tried to get you out off my mind but I can’t manage not to think of you… wow… one way of saying that you really captured my young heart and my whole being… what will I do now?! Forget you?! But forgetting you is the hardest thing I could ever do… or shall I say, if you have time... could you please love me the way I do?!.. I can’t promise anything but my purest, deepest love… I will give it to you as I never give it to anyone yet… You have been my heart’s beat… I’m so stuck on you… Can’t rid you out my thoughts all day through… I wish I could think of something else but you have occupied all my brain cells…. What are you? Can you please tell me? Why must I be so attracted to you like this?



Why I can’t just forget you when everything that I could think of is you… and me… together… forever…

… Have you ever felt the same way too?! Or only me who keeps on dreaming’? I know I have to move on… get rid of all this nonsense emotions. I know, that it will lead me to nothing… but

I cannot do it overnight… So please do cooperate… Stop being gentle, kind, and caring… as if you really care… I know that you are just being friendly, and you cannot blame me of putting meaning in everything… I am just human… a girl… a woman who does not have a wooden heart…  Who loves you for real… But certainly wonders if you feel the same… do you? I’m getting curious… Do you see me?

--by combined Anonymous